Dear Grace {4 Months}

Well hello there beautiful...

This was a big month for you Gracie Pie, as we watched you leave behind the newborn world.  You are a real baby now, a cooing, laughing, toy-holding baby.  You are quickly shedding the marks of your new born self.  You rarely now, if ever, pull your arm to the top of your head as you try to fall asleep ... a signature Grace move most have come to know well.  You started this in utero --we have pictures of it in ultrasounds, assumed this position the first time you fell asleep within the first hour of your life, and now you are leaving it behind, instead finding comfort and security in other things.  I'd be lying if I said it doesn't make me sad to see it go.

You experienced many firsts this month.  You shared your first real holiday, Halloween, with us and even got to go real trick-or-treating.  You made your first trip to the circus, Claws and Paws, and Great Wolf Lodge.  You made your second trip to Knoebels and got to experience their nighttime Halloween celebrations and you even got to go to the pumpkin patch .  You a busy little lady and you just eat it all up.  You are so happy and pleasant everywhere we take you; it's great because we haven't had to slow down one bit.

You are getting so much stronger. You are in a size 2 diaper and 3-6 month clothes. You have started rolling this month.  You can make it to your back if we place you on your tummy and from your tummy you can get onto your side.  You have gotten even better with holding yourself up in a sitting position and can do it with very little assistance.  If we help you balance you can hold a sitting position for a couple seconds on your own.  You are definitely not sitting though, you still need help. When on your back, you often strain to get up into a sitting position.  Of course it doesn't work at all, but we can see your little head and shoulders straining forward and you are able to lift your head up a little bit. You are also bearing weight on your legs very well and can push yourself up into a standing position if we hold your hands to help you.

 You continue to be absolutely full of life and joy.  We see more and more expressions and noises coming from you all the time.  You laughed for the first time this month.  Much to my delight, it was Joey who was able to secure your first laugh.  Ironically, he was "showing" you his hammer and after I cautioned him that you are "afraid of hammers .. and it will make Sissy cry", you started cracking up.  He put the orange handle of his hammer near your face again and more little laughs escaped. I guess you two share the same sense of humor.  You are still stingy with your laughter; only Daddy and Joey have been able to get you to laugh so far.  I am definitely your favorite person still but I'm just not funny like Daddy and Joey. 

You gave us about three heart attacks this month when you started making this crazy, highly disconcerting, wheezing sound.  You sounded exactly like a baby who couldn't breathe and was gasping for air.  We soon came to realize that you just, for some reason, liked making this noise. About a week went by and you started to lay off on the wheezing.  We are now on to growling.  You are an expressive little thing.

You and Brother Bear were just awesome to watch this past month as you finally began to reciprocate the tremendous love and adoration he has for you.  You are such a lucky girl. I hope you look back when you are older at the thousands of pictures we have of  you as tiny babies and are able to see the quiet, unprompted love your brother has for you.  However your relationship evolves, and we will do our best to help sculpt it into the closest, most loyal, most protective sibling relationship possible, I want you to know it was rooted in a natural allegiance and love that simply cannot be taught

.  I don't want you to think for a second that your worth is in your beauty, but you are just simply stunning.  Everywhere we go you generate just soooo many comments.  We were going for a walk today around the lake and your father just looked at you peeking over my shoulder and simply stated, "She is so beautiful .... it's just ridiculous," and kept walking.  Every aspect of your being from your easy, overflowing, smiles to your shining, coy, dark blue eyes echoes the fact that we could not have chosen a more perfect name for you.  You are effortlessly living up to our choice, sweet little one

The past two months have been marked with loss for many people in your life.  This past month you spent many nights at the hospital being passed from arms to arms as we visited your great grandfather who became very ill.  You were, I know, a source of light and comfort for your father in a very difficult situation.  It's hard for us, and particularly your father, to know that you won't really get a chance to know a man who meant so incredibly much to him.  Even in his final days, when he had a hard time responding, his eyes lit up and locked onto you when we brought you to see him. He clearly recognized you, the tiniest one of all.  Just three days before he entered the hospital he was able to hold you.  He wasn't talking much that day, but he managed to ask to hold you and when you were placed in his arms he said you were beautiful.  You were, as you are, a source of joy .. a gift of grace.

We hope for nothing more for you Grace than that you continue to be a source of light and happiness in all times.  We pray that everyone who encounters you will be better for having met you and that you know with every ounce of your being that the people most blessed by having met you, without a doubt, are your Mommy and Daddy.  We continue to feel so lucky to watch you grow. I'm eager to see what the next month has in store.

We love you, our sweet baby girl.